Story of the glitter pen

As some of you know, I am a bit of a pen freak. I love pens...all of them, fancy fountain pens, cool gel ink pens that write real smooth, crazy glitter pens that make you feel like a 13 year old kid. Well, lately at my temp job I've been using the glitter pens at my office. I found them at a dollar store -four pens for .99 cents!!! - and brought them into the office.

Everything's great until one day I get to work and find my crazy glitter pen GONE. It's a .25 cent pen, I'm not THAT bugged about it, and didn't think too much about it. Until this morning when my boss passed me a three page document he needed me to type, written WITH MY GLITTER PEN.

So now not only has my boss been revealed to be a thief, he is also revealed to quite possibly be a woman. I mean, *I* feel gay using this pen. It's glittery and PINK colored!! Really, only people named Tiffany should be allowed to use a pen like this. Yet here is a 50+ year old Chief Financial Officer writing memos with my pen. And now he's using it for ALL his work! He walks around the office with it, goes to meetings with the president with it. It's freakin' AWESOME!!! And if it wasn't so hilarious I would ask for it back.

Now, why don't I ask for it back you ask? Well, the other morning when I was ABOUT to ask for it...he puts it in his mouth. Oh yeah. Now, I'm a pen biter myself, but I generally stay clear of biting other people's pens, especially pens that I have actually stolen from others. So you can keep it there boss man. It's a pay day on Friday, and I might be able to afford to buy myself another.